Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring

I was dreading reviewing this film because I knew I’d make countless notes. I tried not to write down every detail I loved and I’ve tried to focus on how the story was brought to the screen as the story is a book and therefore the praise goes to J. .R. R. Tolkien, rather than Peter Jackson. And, just for the record, the story is amazing. I’m in complete awe of Tolkien for creating such a fantastic story, characters and ways of life. One day I will read the books!

Stand by Me

I’ve wanted to see this film since Family Guy did a spoof of it. Unfortunately, because I saw Family Guy first, I kept laughing throughout the movie as I kept remembering things from the episode. Anyways, the film is about four friends who make a trip to find and see a dead body of a kid their age. It’s a surprisingly very sweet film about friendship. It is ruined by Kiefer Sutherland and his blond hair but we can [eventually] ignore him.

Be prepared to see ‘twelve year olds’ [the characters are 12 but the actors were 14, 15 and 16] smoking and swearing. However, it is done in a very realistic way, especially as some of them don’t know how to hold a cigarette properly.

They may be a year from being teenagers but they have some pretty rough lives already. Chris [River Phoenix] comes from a family of criminals and alcoholics, Teddy [Corey Feldman] was nearly killed by his own mentally-unstable father leaving him with a deformed ear and mental problems of his own, Vern [Jerry O’Connell] is the fat kid who is the butt of every joke and then there’s Gordie [Wil Wheaton] who is ignored at home and feels he is hated by his father who seems to wish Gordie had died rather than his ‘perfect, quarterback‘ brother [John Cusack]. I totally felt for these boys, I just wanted to hug them all.

This movie is the perfect example of superb teenage acting that we just don’t get these days. Phoenix and Feldman in particular were extraordinary. The other two were great as well but I was blown away by Phoenix and Feldman; Phoenix was amazing in the scene where he confesses that he’s nothing like his criminal family and that he’s scared of being stereotyped as one, and Feldman was fantastic when the junkyard owner starting talking shit about his dad and… my God, he truly looked crazy, it was amazing. But we don’t get acting like that these days, those Twilight kids, Disney ones and even though I’m a huge Harry Potter fan, I’d say only Rupert Grint is the decent actor in that series. I don’t know… I feel we’ve lost proper teenage acting.

The pie story! OMG so disgusting but funny at the same time, reminded me of the racist woman from Little Britain.

I loved the scene where the boys [except Gordie] take turns on patrol at night because it really shows their characters; Terry talks to himself and acts like he’s in the war [which his dad was in and made him mental], Vern flinches and points the gun at any sound and Chris just sits there, not bothered at all.

Little Miss Sunshine

8.33pm [May21] – Sorry, once again my mind is crawling with Ashes to Ashes but this is because it was the season finale and the final episode ever and that’s just crazy and there is so much to take in and yeah… I’ll type up the review for Little Miss Sunshine tomorrow when I’ve stopped thinking about Gene Hunt!

1.13pm [May22] – I’m sorry, I’m lossing my determination for this challenge [yet again]. All I want to say is that this is an amazing movie and that you should all see it, its a one of a kind and will make you smile and laugh. I’ve scanned my notes in case you cared, good luck reading my handwriting or making sense of what I’ve written down lol. Once again, sorry. Lets hope my feelings change sooner rather than later.

140/212

Kate
xoxo

The Princess Bride

Ergh. The past few films have been letdowns for me. I’ve read about them or heard others talk about them and I watch them and I just feel like “huh… I don’t see what’s so special.” Unfortunately, The Princess Bride is another. Its funny in places but I didn’t think it was hilarious. My only notes were about the scary eels, the scary rats and quotes. It’s a nice little film that I’d probably watch again on an afternoon where I have nothing else to do and it’s the only descent thing on TV.

Inigo Montoya: [looking down cliff, waiting to kill Man in Black] Hello there. Slow going?
Man in Black: [climbing up cliff] Look, I don’t mean to be rude but this is not as easy as it looks, so I’d appreciate it if you wouldn’t distract me.
Inigo Montoya: [apologetic] Sorry.
Man in Black: Thank you.

Vizzini: Finish him. Finish him, your way.
Fezzik: Oh good, my way. Thank you Vizzini… what’s my way?
Vizzini: Pick up one of those rocks, get behind a boulder, in a few minutes the man in black will come running around the bend, the minute his head is in view, hit it with the rock.
Fezzik: My way’s not very sportsman-like.

As you wish.

123/212

Kate
xoxo

The Man Who Would Be King

My 100th film! I’ve now watched 100 films since the beginning of this year! Will probably do ‘big celebration’ for my 106th film because then I’ll be half way through my challenge!

Anyways, this was a good film to have as my 100th, got to love a bit of Sean Connery and Michael Caine.

Michael Caine’s makeup in the opening scene made me think of Team America which has ruined practically every movie for me because now I seem to not be able to get through a movie [mainly action] without thinking about Team America!

Sean Connery and Michael Caine are a great pair though I feel there could have been a tad bit more best friend chemistry but it was still pretty damn good.

I laughed when the army was walking by. The army is a mixture of different towns/cities, each town/city wearing a different colour. It looked like the opening to the Olympics.

Mrs Michael Caine makes an appearance. I didn’t know who she was but my mum and dad immediately went “MRS CAINE!” We thought it must have been funny for Michael Caine to see his wife be ‘married’ to Sean Connery.

This movie should be seen for the location shots alone. They had a great location manager.

This movie is the [now] classic tale of the test of BFFness [best friend forever-ness]. The moral of the story is… don’t give your BFF power because they’ll bugger it all up.

Bit of a crap review but it was really good.

100/212

Kate
xoxo

Jurassic Park

I love this film. We, as a family, always tried to make sure we watched it whenever it was on TV. Its just one of those family classics even if half the family is terrified! It’s a combination of dinosaurs and a theme park. Two things you can’t go wrong with! The fact that I wrote over a page of notes whilst watching this must be a good sign.

As you see the legendary ‘Universal’ logo go by, all you can hear are the sounds of the jungle which sets the mood straight away. Then you hear the drums and other instruments that signify something huge and exciting is going to happen. We’re then introduced straight away to the danger [and ‘enemy’] of the film with the new arrival of something very dangerous in a scary box! There is a British man in the scene and, for once, isn’t the evil one! He’s the one that knows more about the dangerous dinosaurs than anyone else. Why did he have to be British? And wear shorts that make him a little less cool? Anyway, a man is eaten and the audience is reminded that dinosaurs eat people and that if people were to cross their path, they will be eaten. Lets hope to humans get in their way.

We are shown, straight away, who is going to die first as he is the pathetic, incredibly annoying, indoor-type lawyer. Well, we don’t KNOW that he’ll be the first to die but we hope so. In the middle of the film, he has a nice, humiliating death and we all yell “hurrah!”

Alan [played by Sam Neill] is a man who is stuck in the age of dinosaurs and appears ignorant to the modern world. We also have Ellie Sattler [Laura Dern] who has fantastic legs and John Hammond [Richard Attenborough] who is Scottish and I never realized that until now! How bizarre that I hadn’t noticed before. Anyways, we see some big-ass dinosaurs that look so real which amazes me as this film was made in 1993 [I was 2!]. The character’s responses are close, if not exactly the same to the audience’s. We’re then given a little introduction by the DNA man who explains how we got the dinosaurs and its filled with loopholes but we try to ignore them. The audience may start to feel like they’re in the park as well, especially when we’re watching the ‘pre-recorded introduction’ film. If the audience feel like they’re in the park, it will make the experience of watching this movie all that more real and enjoyable!

One part I particularly love that they show both sides of the argument with and against this park. This is probably in the book so credit to the author! What some films lack is the different sides of the coin. Malcolm [played by Jeff Goldblum] expresses his side and concern about the park and Hammond’s intentions. Malcolm says that the park will fail because of the Chaos Theory; most things can’t be controlled. Hammond argues back with “condors! Condors are on the verge of extinction. If I was to create a flock of condors on this island, you wouldn’t have anything to say!” But Malcolm responds with “No hold on, this is not some species that was obliterated by deforestation, or the building of a dam. Dinosaurs had their shot, and nature selected them for extinction.” I don’t know why but that was a line that really stuck with me. He also argues about evolution and that the dinosaurs can’t breed now but “life finds a way”. He may be the cocky man in the film but you’d want his advice on stuff like this.

One of the things that Spielberg did brilliantly, is the hype of the dinosaurs. We don’t see them completely until about half way through the film. They’re represented through sound and the motion of trees. The Tyrannosaurus Rex, however, has an entrance which is now legendary; the sound of it walking and the vibrations it gives. You look at the cup of water with the little kid [who’s not that annoying which is shocking] and you see the vibrations, you know its coming. It’s a fantastic build up as the sound of it it so much worse than the thing itself [until it eats you, of course]. The T-Rex itself is pretty extraordinary. Part machinery, part CGI. There are a few films that fail miserable at this but this dinosaur looked so real, it was perfect! And why the hell did that girl think it would be a good idea to shine a bright torch in the already pissed off T-Rex’s eyes?! Another part which makes me laugh thanks to Toy Story, is when the T-Rex is chasing the car and you have the close-up of the mirror and it says something like “objects may be closer than they appear”. If you’ve seen Toy Story, you’ll know what I mean. If you haven’t, then where have you been for the past 15 years?!

Then we have Dennis [Wayne Knight] who’s the fat one who we think will be the stereotypical fat one who we all laugh at but no! He’s the bad guy! Shock horror! Stuff happens, he crashes a car into stuff because he’s not concentrating on the road! DO YOU HEAR THAT KIDS?! Concentrate on the road when you’re driving or you will crash and get eaten by a scary, little dinosaur. That dinosaur probably didn’t have to eat for months after eating Dennis… or do you think he took him home and stored him for later…

We have a lot of screaming, a lot of running, a lot of cool, life-like dinosaurs and a little kid gets electrocuted. What more do you need? Don’t know why this isn’t higher in the list. Probably because of the loopholes that we’re still trying to ignore.

5/212

Kate
xoxo

Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom

I have never seen this film the whole way through, shocking I know. Suppose it’s a good thing if I watch and review films I’ve never seen before.

With this film, I found myself thinking four things; “What the hell?!”, “SHUT THE HELL UP!”, that scenes were made specifically for a reason that had nothing to do with the storyline and “SHUT THE HELL UP!”. If you are to watch this, be prepared to think these thoughts too.

It’s a great film, classic Indiana Jones and example of the adventure genre but I found myself poking fun at it and pointing out the bad parts more than actually enjoying it. Don’t get me wrong, I can see why its in Empire’s top 500 films of all time but how it got so high I don’t know. My guess [and opinion] is that it was due to the fantastic sets and scenery and the gorgeous costumes. And Harrison Ford. Shirtless. Sorry, I promise that’s the only time I’ll mention him. Shirtless.

Anyways, the opening gave me the need to double check the DVD as I found myself wondering whether Netflix had sent me The Producers instead of Temple of Doom. Then you see the sleeve of a white jacket and think “James Bond in The Producers?!”. But no, its Indiana Jones and he’s exchanging artifacts and it slowly starts to feel like an adventure film again. Indiana gets poisoned, there’s a big fight with pink balloons and diamonds. It was such a pretty fight.

Then stuff happens and we are introduced to the world’s most annoying child ever! If you loved Short Round, fair enough, I can see why. But me, on the other hand, hoped the kid would be hurt in some way. You’ve got to understand that I love kids, I really do, I think they can be great in movies but they buggered this one up! He’s supposed to be cute but I wanted to throw something hard at him.

However, the Most Annoying Person In This Film award doesn’t go to the kid. It goes to Lady Scream-a-Lot; Willie. Bloody hell. I’ve never heard more screaming in my entire life. Us girls don’t scream at everything! Not even the Disney Princesses scream that much and they’re the weakest of them all! I felt her constant screaming was unnecessary and brought the film down slightly.

Moving on… the palace set was beautiful, as where all the Indian costumes and accessories, especially on Willie [the only thing she was good for]. The food was awesomely gross, especially the baby snakes and the monkey brains. Sorry, FROZEN monkey brains. Apparently if you freeze them, that makes it a desert. Yum. Then came the BST; Bipolar Sexual Tension. They hate each other one moment, then love each other the next. Even Sandra Bullock films do sexual tension better than these guys did! It was unbelievable which made me roll my eyes and mutter “just get on with it”.

We have the classic scenes of spikes in the floor and ceiling which seemed to of stopped at some point as by the time Willie had pressed the release button, the spikes would have been through Indiana and Short hours ago. Then there were the bugs which could have been creepier but I loved that there were no spiders. Thank you! Hate spiders. Ergh.

Then there was the horrible child slavery! Very well shot as I could feel the heat from here and I wanted to run through the screen and help the poor children! Like I said before, I love children so I found it hard to watch but in a good way, if that makes sense. And when they were finally set free and ran to their families, I was almost crying! The way the parents ran towards their children, crying our their names, it was so touching. One thing that made me laugh though was the name of the badguys that held the children captive; Thuggee. I don’t know whether its their accents or what but it sounded to me like “Tuggies” which just sounds adorable.

I loved the set of the sacrifice scenes. Though there was one problem with the last sacrifice scene. When Willie was about to go into the lava or whatever it was, I found myself going “NOO! She can’t die! I know she’s annoying but don’t kill her!” But then she screamed. “Oh, yeah, now I remember why I hated her. Go ahead. Please. End my ear’s pain.” There was something else about that scene but I won’t mention it. Because if I did, it would be just plain girly of me. And not professional. And I’ve already mentioned it. Shirtless.

However, there was one thing that I really liked. When Indiana is in that trance/spell thing after he drank the blood, we all assume that Willie, the love interest, will get him out of the trance. I love the fact that was friendship that brought him back, not love. Must have been a kick in the balls for Willie which makes me happy.

I feel that the [now famous] mine cart chase was put into the film just so it could be turned into a theme park ride. It looked like loads of fun and I felt myself leaning left and right slightly as I watched the cart turn around fast corners. Oh well, it worked anyways! could have been shorter as I think that in real life they’d of ended up in Russia.

In conclusion, it’s a good, classic adventure film but you will find yourself picking at it. Oh, and Willie has bipolar.

2/212

Kate
xoxo